Two Pressures

by David Engelhardt on Monday, October 10, 2011

I talked to a friend this week who gave me some great advise. See, I'm a little competitive, so if I can't be the best I tend to want to give up on the whole processes, whatever process that happens to be. One time my older brother and I were playing a video game and I lost, (a total freak accident) he wrenched the controller from my hand and said "my turn." I could smell the static in the air and had no choice but to, like lightning, batter his face with my fist... And so I did... And then I ran. Sometimes rather than loose in competition it feels better to throw the match. Using my story as an illustrative point, I can think of lots of redeemable characteristics of the soul that could potentially be developed into something worthy of expression but there is a pressure to give up unless it is "the best" or I "win."


There are clear Biblical statements prohibiting such intentions of the heart. Jesus said if you want to become great be a servant and he may have said something about not punching people in the face. There is also an element of good biblical competition; Paul said he runs the race to win the prize. Paul also talks about training and not beating your fists at nothing.


So I am competitive, did I mention that? But something I  get excited about is confrontation with someone huge, mammoth, nay even gargantuan. I recognize that I will likely loose, but there is a feeling of redemption in merely rising to the challenge. I wonder if that's how King David felt? "Man this Giant is about to crush me but I'm going to try and plunge one of these rocks into his skull as he's running toward me, and if I die everyone will think I'm awesome." I would think that.


So one of the pressures is to be the best or leave the game, let's say that's an inappropriate pressure but the other pressure is good; I want to do the best I can and try to kill this thing, I probably can't but I'll take a crazy, consistent, aggressive swing and hope that God backs me up. Here's hoping-

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I recognize that most people write blogs for their own creative exercise. This is the purpose of this blog. This blog is also a bit of a dream journal, as I am one who has detailed dreams. There may well be profound thoughts or at least profound to me, if you think of any please comment-